Blog post - How Often Should Couples Have Sex Each Month?, March 24

How Often Should Couples Have Sex Each Month?

Mar 24, 2025

Ever wondered if there’s a “right” amount of sex to keep your relationship thriving? For many women, finding that sweet spot can feel like a puzzle. Research suggests aiming for about once a week—roughly 4 to 5 times a month—might just be the key to a happy, connected partnership. Let’s dive into why this works and how it fits into your life.

Jump to section quickly:

What the Research Says

Why It Matters

Every Couple Is Unique

Making It Work for You

1. What the Research Says

Studies suggest that hitting the sheets once a week is a pretty great target. A 2015 study from *Social Psychological and Personality Science* looked at thousands of couples and found that those who had sex about once a week reported the highest levels of happiness and relationship satisfaction .

That works out to around 4 to 5 times a month, depending on how many weeks you’re counting. Interestingly, the study also showed that having sex more often didn’t necessarily make couples happier—once a week seemed to be the sweet spot where intimacy and connection really shine.

On average, couples seem to align with this too. According to data from the General Social Survey, married adults in the 2010s had sex about 51 times a year, which breaks down to just over 4 times a month. So, science and real-life habits point to this 4-to-5-times range as a solid baseline for a healthy sex life.

2. Why It Matters

Think toys are just for solo time? Think again. Bringing a toy into partnered play can deepen intimacy. A couples’ ring or a dual-stimulation vibe can sync your rhythms, making every touch electric.

Imagine handing your partner the reins to a remote-controlled toy—suddenly, foreplay becomes a playful power exchange. Studies, like one from the Journal of Sex Research (2021), show couples using toys report higher satisfaction and stronger emotional bonds. It’s less about replacing and more about enhancing what’s already there.

3. Every Couple Is Unique

Now, before you start marking your calendar, let’s get real: there’s no one-size-fits-all here. Every couple has their own rhythm, and that’s what matters most. Maybe you’re in your 20s and going at it more often—studies show younger folks average closer to 80 times a year, or about 6 to 7 times a month.

Or maybe you’re juggling kids and jobs, and once a month feels perfect. Experts at *WebMD* say it’s not about hitting a magic number—it’s about what keeps you both satisfied and connected.

Things like age, stress, health, or even how long you’ve been together can shift the vibe. New couples might be all over each other, while long-term partners settle into a groove that’s less frequent but just as meaningful. The key? Talk to each other. If you’re both happy with three times a month or seven, that’s your “healthy.”

4. Making It Work for You

So, how do you figure out what’s right for you? Start with that 4-to-5-times-a-month idea as a guide—it’s a proven winner for lots of couples. Then tweak it. Feeling frisky? Add a spontaneous session with one of our cute YY Horse designs. Too busy? No pressure—quality beats quantity every time. Keep the lines open with your partner, and don’t be afraid to experiment (our toys are perfect for that!).

At YY Horse, we believe intimacy should be fun, not forced. Whether it’s 4 times a month or more, a healthy sex life is about feeling good together. So, grab your favorite toy, chat with your partner, and find your happy place!